"Hard?" Asked almost a little incredulously, the heat in him rising just a little. "This isn't a fight in Ikea over mismatching dish patterns or a forgotten birthday. Our problems are a little above and beyond that." They aren't a normal couple. They never will be. Neither of them entered into this knowing that, most likely. But that was what Tony needed in someone else. What he sought out in Steve. That he didn't have to fit into a normal box- because he didn't. And he couldn't.
Facing Steve like this, so close, it's a little more than he wants to deal with right now. Especially when he's trying to give Steve a shove so that he'll be the stronger of the two of them. He always is. It's never Tony. It's why when he starts getting agitated it riles something in Tony, too. And when his hands clamp down momentarily Tony feels that heightened spark he always gets around Steve. But more than that he sees what Steve's trying to do. The thing that Tony mused on not moments ago.
If they fight about this they'll probably figure it out. But Tony's not sure he wants that. If he's capable of handing the outcome of that, way down the line.
"Somehow building an element seemed a lot easier than this. Come on. This is a little too much mess for either of us. You're not stupid. I know you can see that. I'm trying to give you an out. Do the smart thing for once and take it." And there it is. They're going to fight. Pushing. Always pushing each other. It's like they can't help themselves. Even Tony knows he's a little addicted to it.
The way Steve stokes fire in him like no one else. It's why quickly- "Don't do this." Almost begging him. "No. You know me. I don't give up. I find a way around. This is it. This is the way around. We go out there together and you don't like the outcome and what then? You're asking me to put all that on hold just because everything might work out in the end? When does it ever?" Voice raising near the end, sharp now, too. Because it is what it always is. Falling into it with each other. The fact that he hasn't backed away, that he's ready to stay right in Steve's face, might be all the indicator necessary.
Because no. He doesn't want to walk away. He can't think of anything more terrible. Except it coming to blows at the end of all of this. That he might not survive. Maybe even literally.
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Facing Steve like this, so close, it's a little more than he wants to deal with right now. Especially when he's trying to give Steve a shove so that he'll be the stronger of the two of them. He always is. It's never Tony. It's why when he starts getting agitated it riles something in Tony, too. And when his hands clamp down momentarily Tony feels that heightened spark he always gets around Steve. But more than that he sees what Steve's trying to do. The thing that Tony mused on not moments ago.
If they fight about this they'll probably figure it out. But Tony's not sure he wants that. If he's capable of handing the outcome of that, way down the line.
"Somehow building an element seemed a lot easier than this. Come on. This is a little too much mess for either of us. You're not stupid. I know you can see that. I'm trying to give you an out. Do the smart thing for once and take it." And there it is. They're going to fight. Pushing. Always pushing each other. It's like they can't help themselves. Even Tony knows he's a little addicted to it.
The way Steve stokes fire in him like no one else. It's why quickly- "Don't do this." Almost begging him. "No. You know me. I don't give up. I find a way around. This is it. This is the way around. We go out there together and you don't like the outcome and what then? You're asking me to put all that on hold just because everything might work out in the end? When does it ever?" Voice raising near the end, sharp now, too. Because it is what it always is. Falling into it with each other. The fact that he hasn't backed away, that he's ready to stay right in Steve's face, might be all the indicator necessary.
Because no. He doesn't want to walk away. He can't think of anything more terrible. Except it coming to blows at the end of all of this. That he might not survive. Maybe even literally.